Hello readership. I don’t know how many of you there are. Five? Fifty? Only one? Only one! Mom?! Mom, is that you?
I don’t know how many of you there are, and I don’t know why you come here. Several years ago I set out to be funny and nonchalant. Your one-stop shop for silly and funny and breezy cynicism. But I couldn’t dam up the tide of all the varied creatures and angels and demons that swim in the soup of my consciousness, so other things have since poured forth. I got political. I got religious. And then I got more religious. But I still tried to be whimsical.
But lately I haven’t been feeling my whimsy. Lately I’ve only felt somber and dour and serious. I’m not happy about it. I’d rather be trying to be funny. But I haven’t learned to harness the beast, so my brain tells me what I’m going to write about, and not the other way around.
So I’m prematurely apologizing to those of you who aren’t all that interested in my religious point of view.
It’s all I can think to write about lately.
Stephen King once wrote about how he knew he was playing around with something, and he knew that he needed to fire up a god almighty steam shovel because he had something monstrously huge to dredge up (for him it was the some 5,000 or so page Dark Tower series). I have a similar feeling. A feeling that there is something lurking in my soul that needs to be said about God, Religion, Church, the cultural landscape I’m bound to. So on.
For better and for worse I am fixated on this. It’s not funny, and it’s not all that fun, but it’s what I feel like talking about.
But I can’t do anything in my life without apologizing for it (my tombstone will read, “I’m sorry”), so I knew I needed to inform you of my marching orders. I’m sorry to all of you who don’t care what I think about God. Believe me I understand and I empathize. I have the feeling that We Need the Eggs is going to be religion heavy for the foreseeable future. If you want to check out please do so. Send me an email asking me to inform you when I am done being boring and I will dutifully comply.
Sometimes when I name things they have a curious habit of fleeing. Now that I have openly declared my intentions maybe they will dissipate. Maybe I will be melting my keyboard with witty insights about Obama, Romney and the hell-like, truth-crunching and suffocating and bloody horrible campaign season that is upon us.
Actually, in light of that, maybe the battle field of Religion will be a welcome respite for some. We shall see.