Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I've Become What I Hate, But It's Not So Bad

Up until this point I thought I could only hate someone who ever agreed with this person:

But that is where I find myself today: In agreeance with Paris Hilton.

You see, the thing is that I hate dumb. I hate it in the general. If someone says or does something dumb then I hate that (this leads to a lot of self-loathing on my part, by the way). Now, Paris Hilton is clearly dumb (or stupid or silly, whichever you think is best), but a group of Australians attacked her for something asinine that far outweighs her general dumbness, and so for once in her life the smart tables have turned in her direction. For those of you too lazy to click on the link, and I know you are many, I offer a synopsis: Hilton was in Sydney to host a New Year's Eve party (she is being paid $100,000) and she went on a shopping spree where she dropped about $3,500 in 45 minutes. She was immediately critizcised by local charities who accused her of calous excess in desperate times.

Paris, God bless her, turned around on they asses and made the irrefutable point that she is performing a charitable and benevolent act by dispensing some of her considerable capital to help out the Australian economy. If more people with the means acted more like Paris then we'd all be a lot better off, financially speaking.

What's really going on here is that it is easy to bag on Paris Hilton (as I have demonstrated above) and so some dimwitted Australians decided they'd get their cuties in, they'd get their licks in and make hay while the sun shines--well guess what? Paris gave it right back to them with a sticker on it and set them spinning at such a pace that they couldn't find it with three hands and a searchlight. And do you know why Paris was able to do that? Because "You never open your mouth unless you know what the shot is," to quote my main man Pacino. That's right, even if it looks like easy pickins, low hanging fruit, cream off the top you don't do it unless you have a justifiable reason.

But what these people did was wait on pins and needles until Paris got to town and then pounced on the first thing that she did so they could get a little attention. That was their plan for the last three months no matter what the first thing she did. The first thing Paris could have done was go to the local leper colony and they would have found a way to spin that nefarious. Nice try guys, maybe that plays pretty well Ausie-side, but it don't play so good state-side.

1 comment:

Jessica DesLongchamp said...

Wow, well that was full of Phil. ;) So I guess you're a changed man now?